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07 December 2009 @ 02:59 am

Meeting Bryan

So after leaving Ronnie at Andrew’s, I pretty much just wandered around the snow capped city for hours. I walked back to Rob’s, but he wasn’t home. So I sat outside his door for almost an hour just waiting for him. He never came so I decided to just move on. Now I’m sitting on the side of this liquor store, my back against the cold bricks and my cheeks pink and tender from the brutal winds. I inhale deeply and breathe in to my hands, trying desperately to warm them. “I thought I might find you here.” My head snaps up and I see Ronnie standing in front of me with a smug look.
“How nice of you to come check up on me.” I reply laughing lightly.

He rolls his eyes and sits down next to me against the bricks. That’s when I realize there’s someone else with him. I observe the other boy, my eyes scanning over his messy long light brown hair, his olive skin, and finally coming to rest on his friendly dark brown eyes. “This is Bryan, he’s my best friend.” Ronnie introduces the brunette, gesturing for him to sit down next to us.
“Hi Bryan, I’m Max.” I extend my hand and he shakes it cheerfully.
“Nice to meet you.” He adds before joining us on the ground.

“So what exactly are you doing now?” Ronnie asks quirking an eyebrow at me.
“I’m trying to come up with a way to get some more booze.” I mutter glancing down the desolate alley.
“What are you gonna do?” Bryan inquires, his eyes sparkling with excitement.
I sigh and shake my head, “You’ll see.” I murmur standing up and pulling my hood up.

I walk down the alley until I find a door, I feel around for the lock and smirk when I find that it’s left unlocked. I open the door wide enough to just squeeze in and I wink at Bryan and Ronnie before disappearing. I shut the door quietly behind me and strain my eyes to look around the dim lit room that is the storage area of the liquor store. I hastily make my way over to the boxes on the shelves, scanning them to find something worth stealing. In the end, I’m able to shove a 40 down my pants, and smuggle a bottle of Jager and a bottle of Absolut in my jacket.

I run back out in to the alley, trying to keep all the glass bottles from falling out. “Let’s go!” I hiss to Ronnie and Bryan and point to the obvious bottles sticking out of my pants and jacket awkwardly. Ronnie stifles a laugh and quickly shuffles down the alley behind me. “Where we going?” Ronnie pants as we slow down at the beginning of the next street. “Back to my house.” Bryan chirps before we break into another sprint in the direction of Bryan’s.
I wrote Max's pov this time. Can you guys tell the difference in our writing?
Place: my room.
Feeling: crappycrappy
Noise: Swag Surfin - Lil Wayne
06 December 2009 @ 01:25 am

Time To Find A Maxie

Ronald Joseph Radkeeee

“What’s his problem?” Andrew asks turning to me, as the door slams behind Max.
“Nothing, what do you mean? He’s probably just tired; we didn’t get much sleep last night.” I reason and shrug my shoulders.
“Were you trying to replace me with him, Radke?” He questions, quirking an eyebrow at me.
“No, I just met him by Wal-Mart. We were both bored so we just got drunk.”

“Yeah, that’s what I thought.” He replies maliciously, pinning me against the couch and pressing his thin lips against mine. He bites down gingerly on my bottom lip and I let out a low moan. He slides his hand down the front of my pants and a shiver runs up my spine. “Can I?” He asks in a seductive low tone.
I swallow hard and inhale deeply, “Not right now…”

He rolls his eyes and stands up from the couch, “Whatever, I gotta go pick some shit up from Red anyway, so I’ll just see you later.”
“Okay, well I’ll miss you.” I say with an innocent smile.
“I’m sure you’ll just go find your little Maxie boy and fuck him. But you won’t let me touch you.” He mutters angrily, sauntering in to the bedroom we share.
I follow him in to the room annoyed, “I told you I’m not fucking him! He’s just a kid I met. How many times do I have to repeat myself Drew?”
“Till you stop lying.” He replies bitterly, shuffling out of the apartment and slamming the door behind him purposely.

I sigh and grab my coat before leaving the apartment and walking back out in to the crisp night air. I inhale deeply as I turn the corner of the street and spot the tunnel near Wal-Mart. I collapse against the brick wall of the tunnel and gasp as the cold pavement touches my skin. Didn’t I just go back to Andrew’s to apologize so he wouldn’t be mad at me anymore? How did this all just happen? “Well hello stranger.” My head snaps up and I smile as Bryan stands in front of me with a huge grin.

“Hey man, what are you doing here?” I ask standing up and wrapping him in a hug.
“Shopping,” he replies gesturing to the bags he’s carrying.
“Oh right duh. Well let me help you out.” I offer taking two of the heavier bags.
“I was actually hoping I’d run in to you. My parents are going away for the weekend and you can stay with me!” He says enthusiastically. My smile widens and I sigh in relief, “Awesome, sounds like a plan my man. When do they leave?”
“They left this morning. That’s why I had to go grocery shopping, so I’d have shit to eat.” He explains and I nod.


I place the bags down on the kitchen counter and turn to Bryan, “Drew’s mad at me again.” I mention with a frown.
“What’d you do now?” He asks quirking an eyebrow and pulling two cigarettes from his pack of Newports.
“Brought a friend over.” I reply and take a cigarette from him, placing between my chapped lips and lighting it.
“Who was it?”
“This kid Max I met near Wal-Mart yesterday.” I reply inhaling and letting the smoke fill my lungs.
“Is he homeless too?”
“Sort of…I mean I think he stays with his friend Rob, but he doesn’t have money or anything. Just this backpack he carries around with like his life in it.” We both laugh and I shake my head in thought, “Hey, we should go find him and you can meet him. I think you’ll like him.”

Bryan chews on the bottom of his lip in thought and then glances at the clock hanging on the wall, “Well I’ve got nothing better to do.”
“Well then let’s go!” I announce, grabbing his arm and pulling him out the door. Time to go find us a Maxie.
Feeling: complacentcomplacent
Noise: Come To Daddy - Aphex Twin
05 December 2009 @ 01:43 am
I'm still not even sure how it all got this bad. I run my fingers through my unruly hair. How could this all be happening? I never meant for this to go this far.
"So you know that we caught Autumn with drugs and we can't really have that in our school. So what does this mean for you guys?" Mrs. Raylman asks eagerly. Everything in the room is so tense. My father looks like he's going to jump over the table and strangle me. There are tears welling up in my mom's eyes, threatening to spill and this makes me anxious. My mom has never cried over me.
"What are our options?" Mom asks sniffling.
"Well obviously she's not allowed in school anymore. Really your choices are cut down to us pressing charges or she goes to a rehab."
My head began throbbing. Rehab? WHAT!? I’m not even close to addicted; I haven't been doing it long enough to be addicted. I look to Tori and Megan for support. Their faces are blank, offering no help at all.
You’re probably just as confused as I am. So let me explain a little. My names Autumn and I’m 15 years old. I live a pretty average life, well up until now I did anyway. Right now I’m sitting in the cramped office of our schools substance abuse counselor, with my parents and two of my best friends. I am the subject of a fucking intervention. And it's so ridiculous, because I barely do drugs. Sure I get high now and then, who doesn’t?
"Autumn why don’t you show your parents what we caught you with. You might as well; I’d have to show them anyway." I pause for a moment, just staring at the wooden table praying and hoping that this will all end. "Autumn?" She becomes more and more persistent. Like she’s getting some sick fucking joy out of this.
I take in a deep breath, plunging my hand in to my bra. I retrieve a small baggy that I toss out on to the table angrily.
"Tell them what’s in it." She encourages. I purse my lips feeling sweat trickle down my lower back. At this point I’m consumed by rage. How can she fucking do this to me? She promised she was on my side, and now she’s fucking sitting here with a fake ass smile on her face acting like my parents best fucking friend.
"Fucking tell us!" My dad bellows irately.
"Pills." I mumble through clenched teeth.
"What the fuck did you say?!" He’s enraged now, his eyes bulging and a vein appears in his forehead.
"Orlando, calm down!" My mom tries.
"What kind of pills Autumn?" That smile. Again with that fake toothy grin.
"Fuck you; you know what kind of fucking pills. Don’t even fucking look at me like that!" I snap standing furiously; my chair falls back against the wall. You can hear the collective gasp in the room as I go from quiet and teary eyed, to fucking pissed.
"Don’t talk to her like that! She’s just trying to help you." Mom reasons, apologizing to Mrs. Raylman.
"Show some respect Autumn! Now tell your parents what kind of pills!" She demanded holding the baggy in front of my face.
"Are they fucking blind, they can’t see what fucking pills!? They're fucking Xanax and Percocets, you dumb bitch!" I cave, but she’s right she would’ve told them anyway.
"And what else did you get caught with last week that I let you off the hook for?"
Oh it was just like this bitch to bring up the past. I look around the room wishing there was some way to escape this nightmare. Megan was sobbing heavily in to her sweatshirt now. Tori had my hand, she was squeezing it every time someone would yell, either trying to soothe me or her, maybe both.
Megan and Tori are here because they were "worried." Mrs. Raylman and the two of them had apparently been planning this for a few months. Scheming bitches.
"Tell them!" I totally lost sight of the conversation for a minute, getting lost in my thoughts.
"Weed, God damn it!" I yell back. I feel a sudden stinging pain in my jaw. I throw my hand up to my jaw abruptly and look around wildly, realizing that my dad had just hit me. I move my tongue to the front of my teeth as I feel blood fill my mouth.
"Orlando!" My mom yelps running over to my dad.
"What you think you're fucking cool? Huh? You think you're cool now because you're a fucking pothead?!" He shouts, disgust dripping from every word.
I swallow hard; I have nothing to say at all. No witty comeback, nothing sarcastic, I don't even want to yell back in his face. Nothing. I feel my eyes fill with tears. And I let them fall, not knowing what else to do. There's a searing pain pulsing through my jaw, but I'm so overwhelmed by emotions and thoughts I can barely feel it.
"You know what Sue; I think it'd be best if we just went home. You can call me and we'll talk about her options." Mom suggests.
"That sounds good. Thank you for coming in. You should probably stop and clean out her locker."
I glance around the room once more before I open the door and walk out. The air stings my nostrils and I rub tears from my eyes, not wanting anyone to know what had just happened in that room. Although I'm sure they all heard it. I wait for my parents impassively in the hallway.
"Hey, what’s up? Why weren’t you in English?" My friend Jeff questions me.
"Just some stupid shit." I reply my red rimmed eyes concentrating on the tiled floor.
"Are you ok?" He’s concerned, which is nice. But right now I don’t feel like being questioned.
My mom saunters in to the hallway closely followed by my dad. My mom gives Jeff a dirty look; she knows that I’ve done drugs with him. My dad on the other hand, ignores Jeff and gives me the dirty look.
"I’ll be in the car." He tells my mom and then turns to walk away.
I mutter an almost inaudible goodbye to Jeff and lead my mom to my locker.
"Why'd you do this?" She's disappointed, which is understandable.
"I didn’t do it for you." I sneer.
"Just get your stuff." She states gesturing to my locker. I do the combination and open the locker door. I'm greeted by a mess. I grab my sweatshirt, my gym clothes, and my iPod.
“I’m done.” I’m glaring at her now, and I sort of feel bad for her. She has to deal with all this shit. And she has to deal with my dad. But I’m angry with her. She thinks I did all this on purpose, for attention or something. And that really isn’t the case. The only reason I do drugs is because it’s fun. Not to worry anyone, or make them pay attention to me. I’m perfectly content with the attention I get now.
We walk outside to the car. I shield my eyes as the intruding sun burns them. Mrs. Raylman told mom I’m expelled. It’s May; we still have a little more than a month till summer. They agreed my best option was rehab. Mrs. Raylman also told her I have to be in a rehab before the months up. It’s going to be a long month.
Place: my room
Feeling: coldcold
Noise: The Serpentine Offering - Dimmu Borgir
05 December 2009 @ 01:24 am
"I love you too, but I have to do this." The young girl pleaded. She clutched a rusty old kitchen knife in her left hand. Her face streaked with fresh tears. Her bottom lip split and bleeding.
She knew things were ending, she knew what was to happen. And she wouldn't let them happen this way. She wouldn't be hurt this way again. Not by him.

"Don't be stupid! Put the knife down!" Her boyfriend yelled angrily. He tried not to show fear, but she knew he was scared. He knew she could easily do this.

The room smelled of fatality and emotions running high. There was blood splattered on the tile of her kitchen. And an awkward silence filled the room. For a moment she hesitated, not sure of this decision. But then she decided, this was it.

And in one rapid motion she plunged the knife in to her chest. She fell hard on the ground as blood oozed slowly from the gash. Her boyfriend collapsed next to her breathless body. As the blood flow became profuse, he realized there was no chance in keeping her alive.

Upon realizing this, he screamed and sobbed chaotically. He loved her, and regretted never telling her this. This was his fault. He glanced at her soon to be lifeless body. Her eyes were turning a pale shade of blue and seemed desolate, no longer holding a vibrant color. Her pigment lost its normal tan color and was now pale as ever. She lay quiet; it was visible that she was dying. And as he looked in to her eyes for the last time he could see the apprehension in them. He couldn't hear a voice coming from her, but he could hear her screaming for life, for anything more than what was to await her.

He couldn't take it, couldn't take knowing this was his liability. He wouldn't let this happen. He loved this girl and would do anything for her. He had never shown her how much he loved her, never showed her that without her he was nothing. But today was his last opportunity to do so. And he took this prospect respectfully.

He took the blood soaked knife from the girl’s chest. He stared at it for a moment, ashamed of how this happened. Yes, she was to die. But not this way. Yes, she was going to die in his hands, but not this way. Never this way.

The crimson liquid which covered the knife had cooled when it hit the air, and he could feel it on his porcelain skin as he gently set the knife to his wrist. The feeling of blood that wasn't his, sent trembles up and down his spine. As he watched blood seep up through the fresh slit which descended across his wrist, he felt adrenaline course through his veins. It was an amazing feeling.

He pressed deeper; hearing the knife break through several more layers of skin satisfied his want for more. He glanced back at his inert girlfriend and spoke his last words, as if she could still hear him, "Till death do us part."

He fell back, his head hitting the floor. And as he could feel blood dripping from his wrists he grabbed his girlfriends hand and held on tight. A smile graced his face and he calmly closed his eyes, slowly reaching his destiny.
Feeling: complacentcomplacent
Noise: This War Is Ours - Escape The Fate
05 December 2009 @ 12:32 am

I Need To Get Drunk.

I must've been sitting there just staring at Ronnie for almost half an hour, when eventually I grew bored.

"Ronnie, I'm gonna go." I mumble trying to ignore the strange emotion bubbling in my gut every time I looked over at him and Andrew cuddled up together.

What the fuck is my problem? Ronnie is my friend, I'm straight I like girls. Right?

"Wait, you don't have to go." Ronnie replies staring at me, the way his eyes shine make my heart race.

"Umm, uh n-no Imma just go. See you soon?" I question trying to shake the thoughts of him out of my mind.

"Yeah, maybe." He mutters cuddling closer to fucking Andrew.

"Yeah, bye." I say turning to open the door. "Hey, wait Max!" Ronnie calls. God can't he just let me leave?

"Yeah?" I ask not bothering to turn, in fear maybe the jealousy would cloud over me again. "I will see you again." Ronnie promises smiling at me from where he sits.

"Ok, cool." I mumble trying to sound like I don't give a fuck. Even though on the inside I’m literally jumping around. I quickly turn the doorknob and walk back out into the cold, icy winter air.

Why do I care if he's cuddled up with some guy? It's not like I like him, he's just some homeless creeper. Who I probably won't see again ever, even if I secretly hope I do.

Let him live his druggie life with Anfuckingdrew. Let him ruin his life, or dig his hole deeper and deeper.

Not that I could really say anything, but my life's different. I drink, he does drugs I refuse to touch that shit.

I don't know what to think now, but I am sure of one thing. I need to get drunk.


written by makexlovexnotxwar; edited by oxy.
Place: my room
Feeling: complacentcomplacent
Noise: Lost, Broken, Confused - Mest
04 December 2009 @ 01:59 am

Feeling Good


So I don’t really remember last night at all. I remember stealing some shit from the liquor store and walking to the park, but after that everything goes all fuzzy. And now the kid that I remember meeting yesterday is screaming about something, I don’t know, I’m not really listening. I just wanna sleep, and he won’t let me. “Come with me to my friend’s house.” He says and I sit up and look at him like he’s insane.
“Why?” I ask curiously.
“Cause we’re friends and friends look out for each other.” He reasons and I stare at him for a minute, unsure of what to say. Friends? I just met this kid yesterday. And although it is nice to have friends, I don’t know if you can really call us that.

I smile thankfully, “Ok, if you insist.” I reply with a soft laugh.
“Alright, let’s go!” He crawls out of the small orange tunnel and I follow suit.
“Where exactly does this friend live?” I inquire as we start our journey, crossing the street and passing Wal-Mart and the liquor store we robbed yesterday.
“Not far, about ten more minutes. He lives in that apartment complex, Tall Timbers.” He explains pointing a green sign, barely visible through the thick fog and from this distance. I nod and we continue on our walk, falling in to silence.

“We’re here, c’mon.” Max announces roughly fifteen minutes later. We saunter up to the door of a large two story apartment. Max knocks on the door eagerly and we wait for the door to swing open, revealing a tall guy with long brown curly hair and bright brown eyes. “What!?” He yells glaring at Max. Max smiles back at him innocently and he shakes his head disapprovingly, “Maxie dear, two things. One: who the fuck is that?” He asks gesturing to me, “When I said you could give some random guy a blowjob for beer, I was joking! Two: where have you been?” He finishes, crossing his arms over his chest and huffing agitatedly.

Max opens his mouth to respond but is cut off by more lecturing, “And where the fuck is my muffins and apple juice Maxwell?!” I can’t help but laugh a little as this dude is totally scolding Max. Max turns and glares at me, as the other dude looks at me sternly, “Chill Rob. This is Ronnie, he’s my new friend. I didn’t give anyone a blowjob.” Max explains pushing past Rob and making himself at home on the couch. “Oh and I lost the apple juice and threw the muffins.” He adds with a smile and gestures for me to join him.

“I’m Robert; it’s nice to meet you. Please come inside.” Rob introduces himself to me politely.
“Thanks, I’m Ronnie.” I reply walking inside the house and sitting on the couch next to Max.
“I was in the middle of making lunch, do you guys want anything?” Rob asks sauntering in to the kitchen and sighing.
“Yes please! I’m fucking starving. And do you have any Tylenol?” Max stands from the couch and begins rummaging around in some drawers in the kitchen.
“It’s in the medicine cabinet in the bathroom.” Rob replies rolling his eyes. “Did you two get smashed?”
I laugh lightly and nod, “Just a little.”

“Here I got you some too.” Max says handing me two Tylenol and a glass of water.
“Thanks dude.” I put the two small pills in my mouth and take a sip of water, allowing the pills to slip down my throat.
“I made you guy’s ham and cheese sandwiches. I hope that’s ok?” Rob inquires placing two plates in front of us. I nod gratefully and pick up the sandwich, fervently taking a bite.
“Slow down Ronnie, you’re gonna choke dude.” Max cautions through a mouthful of ham and cheese.
I shake my head and shovel more food in to my awaiting mouth. It’s been almost three days since I’ve had a meal, and there’s no way I’m passing up this sandwich.

After we’re done eating I decide it’s time for me to leave. I’ve gotta go back to Andrew’s and get my stuff, so I turn to Max and say good bye, “Hey dude, I gotta stop by a friend’s house and pick up some shit. Thanks for bringing me here and shit though. Maybe I’ll see you around?”
“Where are you going?”
“Just a friend’s.” I repeat not wanting to get in to the whole story.
“Well let me come with you.” He suggests shrugging.
“Uh…well, he doesn’t really like visitors…I don’t know.”
“Oh come on, I brought you to my friends house. Are you ashamed of me? C’mon, please!” He begs turning his puppy dog eyes on me and pouting.
“Fine…but you have to wait outside.”


I’m standing outside of Andrew’s door, Max next to me smiling happily. I inhale deeply and knock on the door softly. “Who is it?” I hear Andrew yell. I sigh and roll my eyes, “It’s Ronnie, we need to talk.” I call back and wait for the door to open.
“I knew you’d be back babe.” Drew says when he opens the door, leaning against the door frame casually, clad in only boxers.

“And you brought a friend for me?” He asks enthusiastically, eyeing Max with a mischievous grin.
“Leave Max alone this is between me and you.” I reply sternly. He rolls his eyes and opens the door so I can walk inside. I shuffle in to the living room, Max following behind me and Andrew leading the way. We all sit down on the decrepit couch and I turn to Andrew, “I was wrong for what I said.”

Honestly I don’t even remember what I said, but I was probably right. The only reason I’m apologizing is so I can move back in. When it really does come down to it, I do need Andrew to survive. I need him for the bed I sleep in, for the food I eat, and for the drugs I use. “You were right Drew, I need you.” I admit averting my gaze shamefully.
“Oh baby, you’re so sweet.” He replies placing a soft kiss on my lips.
“Take me back?” I murmur lacing our fingers together.
“Of course.” He mumbles before getting up from the couch and walking in to the kitchen.

“What the fuck was that?” Max hisses once Drew’s out of ear shot.
“We’re sort of together. I just needed to suck up so I’d have a place to stay.” I whisper back, looking around to make sure no one heard us.
“You could’ve stood with me and Rob.”
“I just met you yesterday, I’m not gonna mooch off you and your friend.” I say rolling my eyes. Andrew walks back in to the room holding a prepared syringe, he kneels down in front of me and smiles, “Want some?”

Max looks at me, his blue-green eyes filled with mixed emotions. I quirk an eyebrow at him before taking the syringe from Drew. “Thanks babe.” I mutter before finding a vein in my hand and inhaling deeply. I stick the needle in slowly, feeling the sting of it penetrating my skin. I swallow hard and fill my veins with the lethal mix within the syringe. I hand Drew the needle when there’s nothing left in it and he takes it happily.

I let my head fall back against the wall and within moments everything seems to have slowed down. My heart nearly stops beating and my eyelids become heavy. I lift my hand and observe the veins which are a dark shade of purple. I watch as they pulse and I let out a soft laugh. “Are you ok dude?” Max asks, his eyes shining with concern. I try to reply, but my tongue is dead weight and unwilling to move.

Damn it’s been a while since I’ve felt this good.

Place: my room
Feeling: crappycrappy
Noise: CSI
03 December 2009 @ 12:19 am

Friends Look Out For Each Other

I wake up to my head pounding and an arm wrapped around my waist. "What the fuck?" I mumble jerking away from the arm. My eyes grow wide when I see him, "Creepy homeless guy!?" I shriek jumping up, but then falling on my ass as they pain in my head grows.

"Shut up!" Ronnie groans half asleep.
"What...what happened?" I ask shakily, fearing the worse.
"Huh?" Ronnie asks confused and blinking incredulously, finally waking up.
"I asked what happened last night. We didn't do anything right?" I repeat myself; I can feel the fear spreading deep in my gut.

As dumb as it may sound I’m still a virgin, and I don’t plan on losing my virginity to a total stranger on the streets anytime soon.
"I doubt it Maxie." Ronnie mutters rolling over.
"Maxie?" I question, secretly actually liking the nickname.

"Problem? Didn't think so. Now can you shut up so I can go to sleep?" Ronnie demands. I glare at him and open my mouth to reply. But my mouth snaps shut as I observe Ronnie lying in the tunnel, bundled up in his ratty jacket, and then I feel…pity for him. I swallow hard and decide that Ronnie’s really not so bad, "Hey Ronnie come with me to my friends house." I insist with a genuine smile.

"Why?" He questions cautiously.
"Because we're friends and friend's look out for each other." I reply. A small smile appears on Ronnie's face and he rolls his eyes, "Fine, if you insist." He agrees with a soft laugh.


"Robbie open up!" I call banging on his door, hoping maybe he forgot about his muffins and apple juice.
"What?" He screeches throwing open the door, and then he glaring at my empty hands.

"Maxie dear, two things. One, who the fuck is that? When I said you could give some random guy a blowjob for beer I was joking! Two, where have you been? And where the fuck is my muffins and apple juice Maxwell?!" Robert says trying to scowl at me seriously, but failing terribly as I can see the evident worry in his eyes.

"Chill Robz, this is Ronnie he's my new friend. I didn't give anyone a blowjob, and I lost the apple juice and threw the muffins." I explain, sighing and pushing past him motioning for Ronnie to follow.

So this stories pre-written up to chapter 12 with my cowriter. Unfortunately, my cowriter's gone missing and now I've got no one to finish this story with. Is anyone interested in filling in and writing Maxie's pov? =]
Place: my room
Feeling: angryangry
Noise: Blue And Yellow - The Used
02 December 2009 @ 03:15 am

Good Night Maxie

Ronnie's pov

I follow Max as he runs across the street, headed toward the liquor store. “Wait…what exactly do you plan on doing?” I ask, knowing very well that I’m about to get myself in to some deep shit.
“I told you I need fucking alcohol.” He hisses turning around to glare at me.
“Alls I have to say is you better share that shit.” I reply with a malicious smile.

As we reach the side of the store, our conversation dies down and Max turns to me with a serious look, “I’ll go in after you. You just need to go in and distract the dude behind the counter.”
“How am I supposed to do that?”
“I don’t know and I don’t care, just fucking do it.” Max demands with a sigh.
“You know for a kid, you’re pushy.” I say laughing lightly. Max scowls at me and I quickly avert my gaze, “You ready?” He asks eyeing me curiously.
“Yeah,” I mutter and slowly make my way to the front of the store. I inhale deeply and compose myself before walking in.

As I open the heavy glass door, it makes a ringing noise and the man behind the counter with small beady eyes and a balding spot turns his attention to me. I clear my throat and shuffle over to the counter. I try to muster as much confidence possible and smile at the man warmly. He smiles back unsurely and I lick my dry lips. I say the first thing that comes to mind which unfortunately happened to be, “I’m sorry sir, but I think…I think your cars on fire.”

He stares at me for a moment presumably speechless and then says, “Excuse me?”
“Your car is on fucking fire!” I scream slamming my hands down on the counter for emphasis. His eyes go wide and his mouth drops open before he hauls ass out of the store screaming. Moments later Max comes waltzing in to the store smirking, “You told him his car was on fire?”
“It’s all I could think of.” I admit shrugging. Max bursts in to laughter and runs back to the freezer.

I sit upfront and wait for Max to return with alcohol. I keep lookout for the owner, fortunately Max is done before the guy realizes his cars just fine. We sneak out the back entrance, which leads us in to an empty alley and I immediately begin to run. Max isn’t far behind me as we sprint down the alley and out on to the crowded streets. We finally come to a stop when we reach the park. I collapse on the old wooden bench and gasp for breath, “What’d you get?” I ask looking up at Max.
“Nothing for you.” He replies laughing and taking three bottles from his jacket.
“Oh, c’mon man! Don’t be like that, I helped.”
“Fine whatever. I got two 40’s and a bottle of Vodka. We’ll each take a 40 and share the Vodka.” He says handing me a 40 of Old Milwaukee. I take it gratefully and open the top before taking a long swig of the alcohol.

I watch as Max eagerly opens his and drowns nearly half the bottle in one sip. “Slow down there buddy. It’s not going anywhere.” I remind him laughing heartily.
He rolls his blue-green eyes and takes another sip, “Thanks for helping out by the way.”
I nod and hold up my bottle, “Thanks for sharing my friend.” We both laugh and continue to drink, opening the Vodka only fifteen minutes later and splitting it between the two of us.

Forty five minutes later and Max has drowned his entire 40 and the remaining Vodka. I stop drinking when I can no longer hold the bottle to my lips, which is half way through my 40 and my half of the Vodka in my system. I don’t know what time it is anymore, but the sun is setting and it’s getting colder outside. I decide the best way to escape the freezing winds is to crawl inside the tunnel and pass out. And that’s exactly what I do.

I stumble up the slide, falling down every so often, with Max clinging on to me like a small child. I finally crawl my way in to the tunnel and curl up in to a ball. “M-mind if I…if I join you?” Max slurs with a lopsided grin plastered to his pale face. I close my eyes and hiccup, “Is t-that a n-no?” He asks laughing and lying down beside me.
“Good night…M-Maxie.” I reply before letting myself fall in to a deep slumber.

Feeling: contentcontent
Noise: Sick Hearts - The Used
01 December 2009 @ 02:57 am

Help me, please

“No, actually I’m Ronnie.” The homeless creeper corrected me smiling widely. I rolled my eyes, I looked across the street making sure there was no sign of any Cops. Thank god, I started walking across the street, hoping maybe I would get lucky and get some form of Alchol. Don't judge me.

I stepped of the cracked sidewalk, but was soon stoped by the most annoying voice. "Wait what's your name?" Ronnie questioned. "Why do you wanna know?" I asked trying to keep my voice leveled, and calm.

"Because, you know mine. It's only fair." He pouted, giving me puppy dog eyes.

"Fuck fine, it's Max." I mumbled still thinking of a way to sneak some alchol. "Oh, I like that name." Ronnie said smiling.

"Fuck, dude seriusly i've had enough! I need some goddamn alcohol in my system right now!" I shouted finally breaking. I need to feel the warm liguid roll down my throat, I need alcohol.

"What?" Ronnie asked staring at me as if I'd grown two heads. "Nothing, just can you do me a favor?" I asked trying to calm my raging nerves. "Depending?" Ronnie mumbled jamming his hands into his pockets.

"Can... Can you distract someone for me?" I asked still unsure if I could trust him or not. Ronnie turned and stared at the liquir store,almost as if he was thinking about something.

"Kid, why do you want to get involved with that?" He asked finally returing his gaze towards me.

"I don't want, I need. So please help me." I begged. Ronnie stared at me for a long time before repling.

"Fine, I'll help." Ronnie mumbled looking towards the concreate. "Thanks." I cried happily throwing my arms around his neck, I quickly pulled away trying to push off the akwardness.

"Your welcome." Ronnie said quietly trying to keep up with my quickened pace.
written by makexlovexnotxwar; as always edited by meee.
Place: my roooom.
Feeling: chipperchipper
Noise: CSI
30 November 2009 @ 06:04 am

Just Some Random Homeless Dude

Ronnie's pov

It’s now been an hour and a half since I left Drew’s. I had no where to go, yeah he was right. So I've decided to walk back to Wal-Mart where there's a tunnel used as a walk way, leading from Wal-Mart to some of the other stores in the area. I figured I’d just sit in there for a few hours, just so it’d keep me out of the weather. I’m walking there now, and it’s starting to rain. I can feel the light rain drops trickling down my neck, and this combined with the wind is making this weather almost impossible to walk in.

I pull the thin sleeves of my jacket over my hands and curl them in to fists, trying to warm my lithe fingers and maintain feeling. As I turn the corner of Burnt Mill Road and the tunnel comes in to view, I start a slow jog in order to get there faster. I inhale sharply and gasp for breath as I come to a stop inside the tunnel.

Several people turn and give me dirty looks as they eye me up and down. “What the fuck are you looking at?” I hiss, turning to glare at the older man walking past me. He looks away quickly and clears his throat, carrying on. I sigh with relief and lean against the brick wall, groaning at the feeling of my soaking wet jeans pressing up against my cold skin. My mind is crowded with worry. Where am I gonna sleep tonight? What should I do about food? I totally fucked up by getting thrown out of Andrew’s.

I close my eyes and push my damp hair out of my face. My eyes snap open when I feel the breath get knocked out of me and I stumble, realizing something’s hit me. “Oh shit, dude I’m so sorry!” A boy with messy black hair and bright green eyes says, frantic with concern.
“You should really watch where you’re going kid.” I growl, watching as he bends down and picks up a box of muffins and a bottle of apple juice that fell out of their shopping bag.

“I’m really sorry, I wasn’t paying attention.” He explains shoving the box and juice back in to the bag.
“Yeah…hey, listen you got a cigarette?” I ask hesitantly.
“Nah, I’m sorry man. But…you don’t happen to have any beer or anything do you?” His eyes shine in desperation and I swallow hard, “Nah. You can get some across the street at the liquor store though.”

His smile falters and he averts his eyes hastily, “It’s all good. Thanks anyway.” He sighs and begins to walk away.
“Hey kid!” I yell trying to get his attention. He turns around curiously and quirks his eyebrow. “What do you want with beer anyway? Aren’t you a little young?” I question matter of factly.

He smiles meekly and lets out a dry laugh as he saunters closer, “I’m sixteen and it’s really none of your business.” He points out with a smirk.
“You made it my business when you asked.” I reply scowling.
“You don’t even know me, weirdo.” He crosses his pale arms over his chest and glares at me.
I laugh, “I’m the weirdo? You’re the one walking around with a huge backpack, muffins, and apple juice in the rain.”

“Just shut up! You don’t even know my name, my life is sure as hell none of your business. You’re just some random homeless dude, what do you want from me?!” He shrieks, jumping up and down in frustration. Everyone turns and stares at him incredulously, obviously wondering why he was shouting and throwing a tantrum. “WHAT!?” He screams and throws his box of muffins against the brick wall.

I stifle a laugh and bite my lip, “Calm down freak.” I mutter cautiously.
“Shut the fuck up! You are infuriating!” He shouts turning back to look at me.
“No, actually I’m Ronnie.” I reply with a smile.

Place: my room
Feeling: busy
Noise: Cold December - Aiden